woman performing on the pianoAs a creative or performer you live in a rich and fascinating inner world.  Your art – singing, acting, dancing, or writing – allows you to fully feel and express the depth of your inner world.

At the same time, you may confuse your need to live in your inner world with getting trapped in there…   In truth, you can fully inhabit that compelling inner world and also have the ability to move in and out of it quite freely.

Living in touch with your internal world or getting trapped?  What is the difference? 

I am sure you remember those moments when you felt fully immersed and connected to your inner world.  In these moments everything is flowing, nothing matters.  Time stops, you create and perform aligned with all that you are.  You and your art become one. It feels so real.  Your heart is full of joy and excitement, love, pain, madness or anger…  these raw feelings becoming your art.

And then, when your creative moment vanishes, you almost can still feel the authenticity of your emotions – they fill clean, they feel right.  They don’t control you.  You feel grounded and in your shoes.  You trust what you created or how you performed.

This is being in touch with your inner world.  It feels like having the freedom to fully feel, express, and transform your fascinating inner world into art.  You have access to the best parts to who you are – your abilities, talents, ideas, creative energy, performing energy… all coming together…

At the same time, you remember these moments when you feel some creative ideas, energy, thoughts but you get stuck in.  There is no flow.  Your fears, anxiety, insecurities take you away from experiencing your feelings, your ideas, or thoughts. You can put a few ideas together, but not enough to create your story.  You know you have an important story to tell, but is not coming together.  Something is not quite working…

This is getting trapped in your inner world.  It is more like being controlled by, than being in touch with it.  What started as a creative moment, feels more like an emotional trap.  Important feelings that inspired you to create or to perform, are now interfering with your art.

Why does this happen?  Your powerful creative feelings hooked into some unfinished emotions of the present or the past, you cannot escape them anymore.  Instead of creating, you are lost in some emotional pain or you are distracted by some intense feelings.  Now, you are doubting yourself, questioning your abilities, and wondering if you can cope with your feelings.

In your quest to be the creative or the performer that you can be, you loose your touch with your your abilities, talents, ideas…they become disconnected, not working together anymore.  It is almost like a broken symphony when, the musical instruments are not playing harmoniously together.  Your emotions, thoughts, fears, anxieties, defenses, conflicts take over…

So, how do you keep yourself in touch with your inner world without getting trapped in it? 

By cultivating your emotional self-regulation, you can live in your inner world without getting trapped in it.  In fact, you can fully benefit from your rich inner life, knowing you are the master of your mind.  You can reach deep in your inner world to use it for your artistic endeavors, without being controlled by.

Having emotional self-regulation does not mean denying or repressing your rich emotional life.  It means you can fully be engaged with your complex and rich emotional world, while staying fully in charge of your mind.  You can connect to your inner world to create or perform, without getting trapped, lost in, or overwhelmed by.

When you know how to be with your emotions, you live at a deeper level of emotional richness in order to create your art. This is what feels like to live and create with emotional freedom and emotional wholeness.

How do you cultivate self-emotional regulation?

Every time you allow yourself to be with your feelings without letting them take you to dark places, you cultivate your emotional self-regulation power.

Yes, like that moment that you really needed to cry and that was ok.  You let your tears clean your heart.  And, yes, that moment when you were mad to be mistreated and you chose to assert your rights.  What about that moment when you feel rejected?  It hurt but you didn’t let it dominate you.  And the moment when when you felt like giving up, but you kept pushing through because you refused to allow anything or anyone take your hopes and your determination away.

It takes daily practice to master it.  However, ones you become a master of your mind, you will always be one.  It’s like being a master pianist, once you master the art of playing piano, you will always be a pianist.

Once you have the experience of being the master of your mind and you fully embody this state of being, you will aways be the artist who can be in touch with your fascinating inner world to create your art.

So, I am encouraging you to start practicing being in touch with your feelings – both the good and the challenging.  Embrace them, tolerate them, ride them … And not matter what, don’t let them take you to any bad places.

Creating beautiful lives, is the most beautiful form of art.Mihaela Ivan Holtz, Psy.D. LMFT

Contact me to set up a free 15-20 minute consultation to see if psychotherapy can help you further your career and your personal life.

I am Mihaela Ivan Holtz, Doctor in Clinical Psychology. I help creatives and performers with emotional trauma, depression, anxiety, performance anxiety, creative blocks / creative issues, relationships, and addictions – to be and live their own best version. You can read more about Therapy for Creatives and Performers here.


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